There have been so many fights with my mom that I can't ever really remember what they were about. When my dad moved out, we all fought a lot. Except for my dad. He never fought for anything, for his dignity, for a better job, for his little girl.
He turned into Superman as soon as he heard the word "divorce." He spent time with Mom, and even us. He took my brother and I out to eat, like he had the money. In his apartment, he turned up Fleetwood Mack so loud the neighboors started copmlaining. Mom and he laid down in the floor, feeling the base. Mom looked so stupid. I couldn't believe she was falling for it. Andrew fell for it to. He was only eleven though.
Mom and I fought almost every day then. I kept on telling her that Dad was no different, he's just being manipulative again. It was after the base-through-the-floor experience that things that things got heated up. Was I the only sane person in the family? Our roles had been reversed; Mom was the thirteen year old girl and I was the responsible one.

"Why are you letting him do this?" I asked, feeling the tears come.
"What, he's turning himself around....aren't you happy?" I couldn't hold back any more. That was just rediculous. I somehow managed to scream through clenched teeth, "NO! And he's NOT changing...you only think he is...it's just a show to get you back!"
"And what makes you so-"
"Listen to me!" I said. 'This man....has ruined our lives. You.....and Andrew and I.....are so close to being rid of him. And here you are all crazy over a man who has not and will not change. He had plenty of fair warning before you filed for divorce. Isn't it funny how he turns into a freakin' God all of a sudden?"
"I'm in love again, Faith! Maybe this was just the push he needed to start things over."
"That's it, Mom, I don't want to start things over with him, because it's going to run the same way as it did before, except now, he doesn't have a job, he's depressed, he's about to get kicked out of his apartment...and he's DAD!!! He's childish. He's prideful, and he's lying to your face with all this BS about how he just wants the best for us. If he really did, he would sign the papers and let us move on, for God's sake!"
Mom looked at me, mascara running down her face, mouth open. She looked at me like I was someone she didn't know. I felt so powerful saying these words. I didn't even think about them before they left my mouth. It's like my heart and my brain were speaking for me. I wasn't going to go silent the way I had for so long. I didn't care if Mom was mad or sad right now. I didn't care if I was a being a "good" girl.

Dad didn't change. the divorce was made legal, my parents' marriage annulled. When the quality time ended, and Dad's "interest" in our well-being ceased, my mom would later come to me and say, softly, "You were right."

The multiple fights and this one in particular, have changed my relationship with Mom. Also, theses fights occured right at the time when I was starting to become less and less dependant on my mother, and the divorce made me grow up really fast.
I learned that parents need help too. I learned that sometimes tough love is needed as a wake up call. I learned that I had more power in me than I thought. I don't credit myself with saving my mother from years of torment, or anything like that. I just credit myself with making her realize that things are not always was they seem.

I'm still glad that my parents are separated. Mom and I still fight, because we are realted and confined in a small dirty house most of the time. She's given me tough love as well. I'm almost grown. We're both learning to deal with that.